OH NO HE DIDN'T!!!!!!

Are women really more observant than men?  It is a debate that has gone on for centuries and I am sure will continue for centuries more between the sexes.  Personally, I sometimes think women really are, in most situations concerning everyday details, more observant.  For instance, when I walk into a room, my mind and eyes are already searching, detailing, and cataloging everything that I see.  Looking to determine if another woman is wearing the same dress, has a similar hairstyle, heels, or handbag as me.  If a woman walks by I will even notice if the perfume she is wearing is the same as my own.  Understandably these details may seem trivial to most men but alas, these are the things that women take in almost instantly on a subconscious and conscious level, wherever they go.

As detailed oriented as most men are with sports and games, you would think they would naturally be as observant as women with important details surrounding them as well.  However, how can a man who has gone out with someone for almost three months not immediately recognize the person that they had been seeing almost on a daily basis in a picture?  Actually not just one picture but several.  Not only did they not recognize you, they proceeded to ask out the other person photographed in the pictures with you, your best friend.  Was it their inability to observe the small detail of you being in the pictures? Was it merely a lapse in judgement?  Poor eyesight? A poor decision on their part?  Or possibly a lack of concern for the ensuing consequences that would surely follow such a decidedly stupid idea to ask out your best friend. Needless to say, this clear lack of intelligence will not bode well for the pursuer, as the women involved would and will clearly point out the error of this incompetent man.  Take the time to notice and appreciate the world surrounding you.  The small, insignificant details that you ignore and pass by without notice are sometimes more significant than you might at first realize. 

Cocktail dress photo found here and photo reel image found here
    

Are You Up To Bat Yet?

When I am out and about shopping, I love to experience as much as possible, especially by trying new things.  This includes going into any and every store that might catch my eye or intrigue me in some way.  No matter the price range, the eclectic nature of the store, the type of store; the more different and unique, the better the experience. Wandering into this unknown abyss intrigues and excites me while window shopping.  I savor every moment while trying a new and different experience, even if it turns out not worth my time after all.  You just never really know for sure if you will enjoy the store or not until you actually enter the building and look around, touching, feeling, even slipping into a dress or two that you have been drawn to within the store.  There have been plenty of times I have walked into a store that didn't look like much on the outside and walked out with amazing and beautiful finds by not allowing others to guide my eyes and interest.  

Just as in baseball, or any sport for that matter, you have to at least try first.  A batter doesn't step up to home plate ready for their turn, only to think, this isn't going to be my day to hit anything and put the bat down and leave the game.  They step up to that plate and do one of two things, hit the hell out of that ball and get themselves into the game or strike out.  Either way, they made a choice to try and experience all that the game has to offer.

If you aren't allowing yourself to get into the game, you aren't experiencing life.  Who cares if you strike out.  Every player doesn't hit the ball and make it home, if they did baseball games would last days and not hours.  Don't let your fear of what could or couldn't be stop you from living your life to the fullest.  Get out there and get into the game.  Go ahead and strike out!  Eventually you will hit the ball and will be rounding the bases without even realizing what you have done.  Remember, life is what you make of it, so make it spectacular!    

Photo found here

Radio Silence Anyone?

Every day it seems as if we are constantly bombarded on so many levels, demanding our attention and time.  Advertisers relentlessly seek you out through mail, computers, phones, billboards, and televisions, wanting you to consider their product(s).  You get inundated at work with calls, emails, demands, issues, meetings, and so on, from clients, staff, and management, all wanting you to stop what you are working on to assist them first and foremost; all while maintaining a smile and great attitude.  Home is no different.  Friends and family all seek you out as well, desiring your time, voice, ear, love, attention, and affection.  Everywhere you turn; there is something or someone attempting to draw you into their sphere. 

Usually this quest for our attention is not a bad thing, it is just life as we know and love it to be for each of us.  However, occasionally you find yourself tired of it all, where you just need a break, radio silence if you will, from everything and everyone.  In an effort to obtain such silent bliss, you might have to go to extreme measures.  Such as removing your profile online just to get random people that you don’t know or care to even remotely know to stop emailing, winking, and contacting you daily, by turning off your phone for long periods of time just to stop hearing it ring or vibrate, or leaving your laptop packed away to avoid emails, blogs, social networks, and online shopping sites, and even keeping the television turned off.  You might even take it one step further, by taking off somewhere without telling those you love and know, just to have a few moments to think quietly and reflect on your life without everyone else providing input and insight into every challenge and aspect. 

All of this silence doesn’t mean you don’t care or stop loving those around you.  It certainly doesn’t mean you want to give up all the wonders that technology affords us, like our cell phones, Twitter, and Facebook. Radio silence merely indicates that even those of us who are highly social and always happy to be with others also need a moment of quiet reflection and a chance to re-organize our mind and soul.  Silence anyone?  I am sure you are listening.   

Image found here

Make A Decision Yet?

When I was growing up I tended to take forever to make a decision.  My grandmother would get so disgusted and frustrated with my lack of urgency that she would finally just scream "Kimberly Ann!  Either piss or get off the damn pot!"  I realize that is definitely not the most ladylike thing to say, as it is rather crude.  However, there was great clarity in that statement by my grandmother.  Too many times we take forever in making a decision when unfortunately we realize only too late that the answer we were seeking is no longer attached to a valid question. 

When we are making our decisions we tend to be so afraid of the outcome or answer instead of focusing on the pure essence of the ride we end up losing out altogether.  The questions, the self-doubt, it can be relentless, almost like an unending loop of a bad ending to a bad movie.  Asking in your head over and over again, should I buy those heels, should I make those plans, should I stay in budget, should I ask them out, should I say yes, should I say no, should I try to kiss them, should I turn away, on and on it goes!  Should I, Should I, Should I, Should I……..   

Personally, I am still plagued as an adult with taking much too long in making many of my decisions.  At times I think I can actually hear my grandmother yelling at me as before when I was a child, encouraging me in her own unique way to really just be brave and make a choice.  The choice doesn't always have to be perfect or even right; it just has to be made sometimes.  That is the beauty of life, even with mistakes we learn and grow.  So jump off and see where the ride takes you, who knows, you might actually enjoy it!

Photo found here

Discovery is fun

By no means am I an expert on kids, at any age.  However, I do know this much, small children between the ages of twelve to about sixteen months are fantastic to watch!  Everything they see, touch, smell, come into contact with is pure excitement, complete uncensored joy.  The simplest, smallest thing can bring absolute happiness to their faces to the point that they squeal with delight, running as fast as their chubby, uncoordinated little legs will carry them to their destination of amazement. Unfortunately, as they begin to grow and talk, their sense of wonder tends to fade. As adults, they no longer allow themselves the simple joy of squealing over an ice cream or puppy.

I, on the other hand, try to channel my inner child frequently, trying to obtain that same feeling of happy bliss in my everyday life as often as possible.  Fashion definitely pulls out this type of excitement easily for me, whether it is a beautiful heel, gorgeous gown, or some shiny, sparkly piece of jewelry. Any of these type of items can easily garner a squeal, smile, and sigh from me.  What is truly odd or amazing, however you choose to decide, is that dating also brings out this same sense of wonder and joy for me.  Before a date I begin to ponder what will we talk about, will he laugh at me or with me, will he get my off-balanced sense of humor and outlook on life?  Once I actually go on the date, if things are going well and the chemistry is there, I can feel the inner child bursting in me at inappropriate times, wanting to squeal and clap in delight for whatever reason. Does this make me weird?  Probably.  However, I am totally okay with that, as I see my sense of wonder and delight for life, people, and everything surrounding me, as an attribute, just another added layer of my quirky attitude and behavior. 

The next time you see a small child running to grab some random stick on the ground to touch it in unabashed amazement, squealing upon touch, stop and enjoy that moment.  Savor and store that memory away for yourself.  Later, when a future occasion presents you with an opportunity, pull out that memory and use it yourself.  Squeal with delight and clap like no one is around when your waiter hands you that slice of cheesecake or glass of wine, when the sales clerk hands you the bag containing your newly purchased heels, or when your date shares something hysterical and honest revealing a little of their true self to you.  Laugh, enjoy life's delights, and above all, love everything and everyone unabashedly!  

Image found here

Online Vs Instore Shopping

When you go shopping how do you prefer to do it, is it online or in an actual store?  I always thought I would be just the "in-store" sort of gal for everything I ever purchased.  As I do love to touch and get to know the item more personally, up close.  However, lately, I am all about the on-line shopping experience when it comes to certain items of interest in my life.  You can check out a multitude of merchandise without being interrupted, you can block unwanted solicitation, viewing only items "matching" your criteria, and weed out what you are and aren't looking for much faster online than in the store.  Once you have your "select" items, you can then decide which are really worth your time and energy viewing in person.  Don't misunderstand, I still absolutely love slowly perusing any and every store I come across that has clothing, shoes, bags, and/or accessories of interest.  Shopping online for other items of interest in my life just frees up more time for my passion for fashion!    

 Image found here

Playing Games

Being that I am still fairly new to the dating scene again, so many of my friends, both male and female, have spent many hours in trying to assist me in the art of "the game."  Personally I enjoy playing games but detest all of the rules, the more complicated, the less likely I will want to play.  Clear-cut, simple, non-complicated, that is me for the most part.  If I am required to follow "rules" I want to at least know what they are so I can follow them as precisely as possible.

Unfortunately that is not the case with dating as the rules are more gray, if anything, and continually change.  Why must I pretend to not like someone when I do, not answer when they call when I want to talk, ignore a text for a few days, or worse, pretend to be busy when I am not and would like to see them?  It is simply exhausting all of the rules that I am told to follow by everyone, leading me to absolutely abhor these games.  It is like trying to find a bargain basement sale of Manolo Blahnik shoes. The only way to find the sale is with the use of an encrypted map, a map that has streets and landmarks that have changed.  Nothing is decipherable on this map and the location continues to move.

I understand and appreciate the idea, the necessity of the hunt, if you will, between a man and a woman.  However, even a hunter and its prey realize you need some form of direct, understandable, and reliable information and direction to lead you through the forest either away or towards one another.  Otherwise, you won't ever make it out of the woods. 

Image found here